Um, excuse me, may I interject?

When I think about things that I’m thankful for, I’m reminded of manners. Without please and thank you, we’d get nowhere (at least, nowhere with relationships intact).

My oldest (and, of course, “wisest” wink, wink) sister-in-law taught me one of my first lessons in developing good manners: how to gracefully and properly interrupt people talking, which comes in handy being a reporter.

I must have been very young, because I remember being small, quite small, coming into my parents’ kitchen, where my brother and sister-in-law (then future sister-in-law) stood talking, she with her back against the sink counter, my brother with his behind against the stove burners (about right, wouldn’t you say?). I marched right in between them, heedless of their conversation, and started my own with my sister-in-law, an action to which she knelt down, politely informed me that she and my brother were talking and if I needed to interrupt their conversation, I should say, “Excuse me.”

To a talkative kid, those were magic words. I thought I’d just been given the master key to any conversation, adult or otherwise. I did what anyone would do if they stumbled upon a master key: I started opening all sorts of conversational doors. If my parents were talking, I’d barge right in with, “Um, excuse me. Mom, excuse me.” If my sister was talking on the phone with her friends and I needed her attention, “Excuse me. Hey, excuse me.” If the dog was eating her food, “Excuse me, Ensign.”

Man, I was on a roll, catching everyone’s attention and breaking into conversations all over the place. My rampage ended when some weeks later, I made an attempt to excuse my way into another conversation between my sister-in-law and my brother.

Clearly interrupting her–

(“But I said excuse me!”)

–my sister-in-law then explained how to properly use the phrase and how waiting until the current conversation reached the appropriate level of pause before you jumped in so not to (do exactly what I intended to do) interrupt people.

“See, you then have their attention.”

So, basically you’re telling me, I thought, I have to wait my turn to talk? Well, that’s not fun. And if the conversation is done, what’s the point? And what if I have something to add to the conversation?

Then that’s an interjection.

And an interjection’s okay to throw in at any time?

So long as it’s appropriate and relative to the conversation, yes.

Super, I thought, and started watching conversations like a prowling jungle tiger for my time to strike.

When I think back about this lesson in manners, it becomes clearer and clearer to me that at its very basis, it was a lesson in communication and helped me build a critical skill required for my journalism profession: how to keep my mouth shut … and how not to!

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