How to take your Monday from boring to exciting in a few easy steps

A few Mondays ago, I was walking on the Prairie Path (a nature trail that runs across Illinois), and I was trying to social distance. Bikes raced past me. Clusters of Nike-clad joggers forced me to the outskirts of the trail. I had enough.

I left the trail and ended up in calmer waters: the sidewalk that runs parallel to the path.

I will never do that again.

Within a minute, and seemingly out of nowhere, a squirrel appeared to my left, on the ground, next to a fence that belonged to someone’s yard.

In a fateful mix of my walking pace and its sudden urge to bolt toward me, our paths had crossed. Literally.

In retrospect, I didn’t think it was possible to come into physical contact with a squirrel, even if you really wanted to. I thought it only happened to people like Steve Irwin, the crocodile hunter, or similar legends.

I was wrong.

The squirrel collided with my leg and proceeded to scratch and climb up near my knee. Then it catapulted off, leaving me stunned and with an array of deep red scratches.

It took me a while to realize I should probably consult a doctor or at least check Google and read some unhelpful forums about squirrel collisions, probably from 2006.

“We don’t think you’re at risk for rabies,” said the nurse on the other end of the phone. I called the urgent care on my walk back home (this time on the crowded, rodent-free Prairie Path).

In my mind, this was how it would all unfold: not only would I have rabies, but I would also contract Covid-19 at the urgent care. That would be my story. Maybe there would be a movie about me.

In reality, the nurse who saw me unsuccessfully tried to hold in a laugh. “Wow we never see this,” she said. “Something to talk about over dinner!” she offered.

Turns out, I didn’t need a shot (and two weeks later, I’m still Covid-free). Instead, I was sent home with Neosporin. A let-down in a good way.

“She was trying to social distance!” I heard the nurse say to the other medical staff as I left the clinic.

The weirdest thing to me about the whole incident was that the odds of my squirrel encounter were technically so low.

There’s no moral to the story here, no sage advice. But what I did steal from this experience is the idea that a rare event occurred. So, that thing you want to happen? It might actually happen. You never know. Maybe you just need to take a little step off the path.

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