Q. I am a very concerned daughter who is worried about her mother. My mom, 68 years, has been on self-quarantine since COVID-19 was declared a global pandemic. I unfortunately live states away. My sister lives nearby, but because she continues to work in the hospital setting, she has chosen not to visit our mother during this crisis. My mom is used to spending a lot of time with my sister and her family throughout the week. She feels cut off and isolated. She does venture out to pick up essential items and only goes to stores that offer senior hours. I’ve been video calling as often as I can still feel worried about her emotional well-being. Do you have any suggestions on how I can brighten her day while not being able visit in-person?
A. The COVID-19 pandemic has drastically changed everyday life and I empathize with your situation. You are not alone in feeling concerned about your mother. Many families all over the world are experiencing the same feelings you are and are looking ways to boost the morale of their aging loved ones when they can’t be present in their lives.
Here are a few ideas to help your mother stay emotionally healthy as we all wait out this global pandemic.
Make the most of your video chats by arranging fun play dates with grandma. Host a virtual tea party with the granddaughters or pajama party with the grandsons. Encourage everyone to dress the part. Serve appropriate foods and coordinate with your mom so that she has the same menu. If your children are older, try playing games via video chat. Check out the Houseparty app, which lets you virtually play popular games with up to eight people.
Send her love in the mail. Ask your children to color pictures or make handmade cards for grandma. Create postcards using apps such as Ink Cards or Postagram and put a smile on your mom’s face.
If she has a favorite restaurant that is offering safe, no-contact delivery, considering surprising her with lunch or dinner. Just call her ahead of time so that she knows to expect a delivery.
Encourage your mom to use the down time to organize her house or engage in a favorite hobby. Order adult coloring books for her, or gift her a few word-puzzle books so she can occupy her time while engaging her mind. Does she like to decorate? Encourage her to decorate her window so that the neighborhood children have fun things to look for while they’re out on walks.
Continue to encourage your mom to get outdoors and to shop safe. If the weather is good where she lives, encourage her to sit outside and read. If she’s able, suggest she take a walk every day around her neighborhood. It’s almost garden season, suggest she start seedlings and watch them grow.
I applaud your family’s efforts to keep your mother safe and healthy. Although I can understand how difficult it is for your mom to essentially be cut off from her support network, it is critical that you all take every precaution necessary to keep those around you healthy. Without taking social distancing seriously, the virus will only continue to spread. Thank you for doing your part to stop the spread.
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